Get Thee to a Nunn'ry

I’m a Shakespeare nut. I like to read it, I love to watch it…some parts I understand very little…others strike quite a chord. One quote, taken from Act III, Scene 1 of Hamlet, I’m sure we’re all familiar with came rushing to me today as I sat in church, of all places. Pastor was talking about finding contentment…casting off things that cause us to sin. Are we content with our lives and how we live them? Hamlet, breaking from his act of insanity, instructs Ophelia, “Get thee to a nunnery, why woulds't thou be a breeder of sinners?” She betters him. Rather than rushing off to the church we later find her floating peacefully below the water devoid of breath.

Why did this thought come to me? I’m weary. Society tells us we need more…we need something new…we need to keep up…if it feels good, just do it! Why?! Why do I need more? The more I have, the more shackled I am to it…hold on, I’m getting ahead of myself. Let me give you a point of reference.

Yesterday, I sat down at my computer and pulled up my new companion, Facebook. What was everyone up to today? The familiar “blip” sounded indicating someone wanted to chat. Ahhhhh, the new Fremont “friend” I’d accepted last weekend because we had a few mutual friends. From looking at his page and reading his posts (which NEVER have any form of punctuation whatsoever…something that makes me want to beat people with a hammer. That‘s fodder for another blog.) I've gathered this guy isn’t completely with it. So, I’ve cut him some slack and chatted with him for short periods in the past. This is how the chat session played out…

“R u dun cleaning yet” I’d mentioned in my status update that I was cleaning my house. Please note the lack of punctuation….AGAIN.

“No, just taking a break and making supper”

“Do you have kids”

“Yes, two.”

“How old” Geez! Twenty questions!

I hesitate and respond, “4 and 11”

“R they with u” What the hell?!

“Yes, almost always”

“R they in the house” This is getting personal….and bizarre. Why? Are you waiting outside to whisk them away? If so, let me pack them some bags.

After what seemed to me like a long pause I responded, “Why?”

Long pause on his part… “Do you flirt” What, what? Oh, I get it now. I see where this is taking the conversation. My cheeks are burning…not out of embarrassment…out of anger.

“No. I’ve made a rule as of late” That should confuse him. Had I not become so angry so quickly I’m sure I could have come up with a much more witty response….like, “Kiss my ass, jerk!” Wait, that’s not witty. How about “Find someone else to join you and your hand tonight.” Yeah, that would have been good.

“What rule” See, I told you, I confused him with all those extra words after “No”.

“I don’t flirt anymore…with anyone.”

“Can I tell you what I would say if you did” OMG! Persistent little jerk!

“I was recently hurt. My heart’s all boarded up.”

“I bet I could get in” Ugh! Go away!

“Nope. No one’s getting in.”

“Let me tell you what I would say if I did.” At this point I’m ready to hunt the guy down, feeble minded or not, and knee him!

“No thanks.” And I shut down the chat and marked myself as offline long enough to remove him from my friends list.

What compels people to act like this….to a stranger? Are we all just objects…pawns…to each other? When did we, as humans, forget that people have feelings? I spent almost 10 years being an object to my husband. Nothing short of being a piece of meat; a walking, talking parking garage. Damn it! I have feelings; though I have no visual proof, I do have a brain in my head and a rather advanced one I‘d like to think. I’m not to be used and cast aside. We all have feelings. Each and every person we meet on the street, in the coffee shop, at the store has feelings that can be broken, mangled, damaged sometimes beyond repair. We’ve turned our eyes from our future goal and settled for what makes us feel good now…no matter who we hurt in the process. I’m no less guilty myself. There are no stones that I can cast. But I can REFUSE to allow someone to make me feel that way again and I can do my utter best to not do it to other people. Hamlet may have been on to something. If I could, I would get myself to a nunnery.